Tomorrow is 2 weeks since I started the anti-depressant Effexor XR. A lot has been going on, but some of the things, I just haven't wanted to talk about. Am I feeling better? Hell yes. Have I lost weight? Yep! Am I where I want to be? No, on both the 'feeling better' and 'weight loss' fronts.
So, yes, the Effexor has helped my mood, but I'm on such a low dose, I think I could be doing better on a higher one. Unfortunately, my PCP asked me to wait until the first week of December to increase my dose. Trust me, I'll be calling her office for that prescription ASAP.
A part of my lingering funk is that Mr. Banker is still a little down, and it rubs off on me. I care about his well-being in a way that I haven't cared for someone in so long. I love him. I don't understand how love can be absolutely freaking amazing and still suck at the same time. It's this decision to give someone your heart and know they could tear it apart, but trusting they wont. I'm not sure if he knows that I feel that way, and I refuse to say it unless we're officially 'in a relationship', so I don't think I'll be letting those words leave my lips anytime soon.
As far as weight loss... the day I saw my WLS PA last (November 7), my scales said 260.2. Yikes. My lowest since surgery was 242.something. I got a fill and was doing pretty well at 7.8CC in my band, until the scale started to go down again. By Sunday, my scale said 249.8. Yes, that is a 10.4 pound loss in 10 days. When my band is right, I promise you, I'm rocking it! But with such a drastic loss, my band is loose again. So, tomorrow I'll be back to visit Erica at the fill clinic again. She must get so sick of seeing me. I'm anxious to see what her scale says, because our scales are different, and her scale usually has me weighing a bit less than my own. So I guess I'll be checking in with you all about that tomorrow.