Wednesday, September 30, 2015

House updates with Photos


Although not weight loss related, a few of you asked to see updates to my home I've been doing.

In August, I began by tearing out the laminate in the kitchen and bathrooms, and tile flooring was installed. My kitchen also got a backsplash.

My upstairs carpet was removed and we put back laminate hardwoods. They're so easy to clean and look beautiful!  You can see them pictured in the crib photo below.

We painted our bedroom grey with a darker grey accent wall. I changed the bedding and we hung Mr Bankers picture of NY above our bed. It definitely feels more like "our" room now, and not just mine.
For the nursery, we painted the room grey with a teal accent wall. It's not finished, but the baby bedding arrived yesterday and it's so beautiful that I was literally in tears. Call it hormones or whatever, but I couldn't help realizing how real this is, and that Xavier is coming soon when I saw it. Mr Banker picked the bedding and I'm so happy with his choice. I wouldn't have picked it because it was much more expensive than I would have wanted to pay, but I absolutely love it.

Monday, September 21, 2015

32 Weeks Pregnant

Hi everyone, just wanted to stop in with a quick pregnancy/weight update.

So... I'm still lighter than I was the day I found out I was pregnant, but I have watched the scale creep up slightly and that is hard!  SO HARD!

Above is a picture I took Friday at 32 weeks.  It's insane, I hardly even look pregnant at all.  7.5 weeks left, hopefully I can stay under my pre-pregnancy weight in the next 7.5 weeks!

Thursday, September 3, 2015

A Love Without End

"Let me tell you a secret about a father's love...A secret that my daddy said was just between us.
Daddies don't just love their children every now and then, it's a love without end, Amen."

Believe it or not, I loved country music as a child.  That doesn't fit me now, but it would've if you knew a 7 year old Hollee.  The above lyrics come from a George Strait song that I loved as a kid.  Even as a child, that song could bring me to tears, and now I believe that somewhere inside I always knew it would be difficult with my dad.

No matter what, I always said that no matter how different we were (or as some say, polar opposite in beliefs but two of a kind in stubbornness), that I got lucky.  I had a father who always made sure I had everything I needed.  He sacrificed for me and my mother when we needed it.  He sold his beloved jeeps when I was 4 years old to put my mom through her nursing program.  When I was 22 and got kicked out of my living arrangement and decided to buy a home on short notice, he sold his extra vehicle so that I didn't have to decide to sell my classic car for a down payment on my home.  That is just the kind of man that my dad is.

But even with his good qualities, his bad ones can far outshine them.

My dad hasn't spoken to me since the day that I told my parents that I'm pregnant.  His hateful words about me getting pregnant on purpose just to ruin HIS happiness and how Mr. Banker would leave us like black men do were hard enough.  As the months have passed, those wounds have only gotten deeper as I realize that my son won't get to know his grandfather.  And I can't help the tears that begin to stream down my face as I think of how I will explain to Xavier when he gets old enough to wonder why he doesn't know his grandfather.