Thursday, July 25, 2013

It's electric!

In about 22 hours I will be running the electric run 5k with Patrice and 2 other friends. Exciting? I guess.

I was really excited about my mini trip with friends until Wednesday...then my spirit got broken.

When I first signed up for the electric run in April with Patrice, she couldn't stop talking about us getting together to pick costumes to run in. The VERY FIRST THING I said was "I don't care what we wear, just please keep my body type in mind." Patrice was insistent I'd be at my goal weight by the race, but I knew I wasn't going to lose 80 pounds in 4 months. As someone who has never struggled with her weight, I guess she has no concept of how difficult it is or how long it takes to lose a total of 150 pounds. Anyway, she finally agreed to be mindful of me with whatever she picked.

Two weeks ago, she sent a link to a light up tutu one of the girls purchased for the race. It was cute....but it was "one size fits most", and according to the sizing chart, "most" are an 8-10. I responded the tutu wouldn't fit me and she only said "ok" so I assumed that meant "ok we will pick something else".

By Wednesday, when Patrice hadn't mentioned costumes with only two days left to the race, I asked. Apparently the three other girls chose to get the tutus anyway.

My feelings were so hurt. I cried for over an hour at work because I felt so left out. I even started to think about not going to the race anymore.

I took a few hours to think about it, and finally sent Patrice a text to tell her I wasn't going to Charlotte for the run. She asked why and I just told her I was hurt and upset that they would be so inconsiderate of my feelings. Apparently it hadn't occurred to her that I would feel this way and she offered to not wear her tutu so I would feel more comfortable. That wasn't the point.

I appreciate the after thought, but it just reminds me of why I don't want to be the fat friend anymore! I guess I'll just file this away in my motivation folder and move on.

I ended up buying some Tulle and making my own tutu. It isn't fancy, sexy, and have lights on it like theirs, but it will have to do. I feel a little like a cow in it too, but I want to wear it anyway.

Hopefully it can still be a good night :-/

10 comments:

  1. I'm sorry your friends didn't take your feelings into account. Whenever I want to be sure I'll be accommodated, I know I have to take charge because, on a basic level, people who have never been big just don't get it. I think it's great that you are going anyway, and I hope you'll end up enjoying it. And I bet you look cute in your handmade tutu!

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  2. It's weird how people are our friends but they don't always think about the challenges that plus sized girls face. I don't think that it's intentional--but I think that sometimes they don't see us as being 'bigger' or 'different', they just see us as their friends--and maybe don't take into account the differences in sizes--because they love us anyways.

    I think that your tutu looks totally awesomely cute--and you will ROCK IT! Besides, now you can be the butterfly in a field of the same flowers!

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  3. I'm so glad you're going anyway and I bet you'll have a great time! (Also? Your tutu is probably way better.)

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  4. I agree with Austin Bander...your tutu is WAY better! I've been in this situation before with bridesmaids dresses, so I know exactly how you feel.

    I'm glad you decided to go though! You will feel like such a badass when the race is done.

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  5. Your tutu is awesome. Screw thier tutus!

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  6. Woman! You look amazing in it!

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  7. Love the tutu girl, you are rockin' it! I'm glad you're still going and I'm sorry your friends weren't considerate about your feelings. Have fun at the run :)

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  8. You are rockin' the tutu! Can't wait to hear how the race goes!

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  9. I love the tutu! I'm so sorry your friend was not more considerate. I understand the feeling, I am the only fat girl in my group. Our friends love us, and see us for who we ARE so sometimes they forget we are overweight. I have had friends accidently go to tell me a story about someone fat! Um, HELLO!

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