I've been eating my feelings today. That's something I haven't done in a LONG LONG time.
It just shows me that I am still a fat girl in my head sometimes and I have to try harder to fight it. That's why I'm here now, blogging. To keep me from putting another piece of food in my mouth. I don't even know where it all fit. Before noon I had eaten
A piece of french toast
Chobani flips yogurt
Meat and Cheese Lunchable
A small piece of Broccoli Chicken Cheddar quiche
Where the hell did all that food fit?!
I don't know, but it went somewhere....
I got upset today over family stuff. Basically, I had offered a bedroom set built by my great grandfather to my aunt and uncle. I simply don't have room for it and getting rid of it was breaking my heart, but my son needs a nursery more than I need to keep that furniture. I wanted to keep it in the family, so I offered it to this aunt and uncle who has pretended to be supportive during my pregnancy, but I now have a suspicion that it truly was just an act.
I offered this furniture to them over a month ago, and they still haven't come to get it. It's been sitting in my garage for over a month waiting on them to come get it. My water heater burst last week, flooding my garage, so I asked them to try to make a trip to get it out of the water, they told me to move it somewhere dry. If I had anywhere dry to put it, I wouldn't be giving it away. That's beside the point. Anyway, they went to my father yesterday and told him I was giving it away, and also lied telling him I had gotten rid of all of my grandmother's crystal some time ago. I gave a few pieces away 2 summers ago because I thought it was a nice thing to share with my female cousins, but I kept most of it. Regardless, them telling my dad all of this did not help an already very unfortunate situation, I was called an ungrateful bitch, etc. It just gets so frustrating trying to do the right thing and feeling shit on for it.
I know I was trying to do the right thing, so what anyone else thinks shouldn't matter, but it hurts my feelings. I feel betrayed. I feel like doing the right thing is useless. But I know it's not. And I know I'm still the better person.
Putting this here may only temporarily stop the emotional eating, but I'm hoping this emotional purge will help.